Crypticon 2017: In Which I Had Too Much Fun to Remember to Take Real Pictures

You know when you procrastinate about doing something and eventually you start having stress dreams about it and one of those stress dreams is you actually doing the thing you’re putting off and it’s so vivid that you actually believe it’s done until someone asks you “why didn’t you clean the litter boxes???” and at first you’re like “uh I did tho?” but after thinking about it, it dawns on you that you didn’t actually change the cats’ litter boxes because it was a dream? Yeah, that was pretty much me writing this post. I work with kids in public school and since the school year is coming to an end, my work schedule is completely topsy-turvy, which contributed only slightly for this delayed post….mostly I just forgot I didn’t do it. 

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Michael and I showing off our boss Stranger Things/Aliens T’s. I say “our” but in reality both these T-shirts are his. 

This was my third year at Crypticon, Seattle’s annual horror convention. In the past, I had only gone one day but this year, we decided to get a weekend pass and stay in the hotel the convention was being held in. Last year we made the grave mistake of only planning on going to panels, back to back to back. It was really not a sustainable way to go about it so this year we took a different approach. Since we didn’t really care about any of the guests (unlike last year, when horror icon Tony Todd was the guest of honor and I was almost dead) so our main objectives were panels, films, and the vendor room, but broken up enough that we could get through most of the weekend. I think we were pretty successful at doing more than we did last year…except for taking pictures. I did a really bad job at that this year. I literally took one or two pics, mostly of our hotel room (did I mention my love of hotels?) which turned out to be an expensive shit hole, but that’s neither here nor there. What were the highlights of the weekend? I am glad you asked!

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I was a BIG fan of the catalog art this year.

Panels 

Last year, we saw what felt like one million panels so this year we reduced that number to ones we only really wanted to see. Since there were a lot more short film blocks we were looking forward to, some panels we thought might have looked interesting (Star Trek and Horror) took a backseat. 

We did go to three: Mental Illness in Horror, Gender and Transgender in Horror, and Black Representation in Horror. All three of them really were amazing; I was worried that the first two panels wouldn’t have have people with mental illnesses/trans/non-binary people on them but they both did! Our favorite by far was the Black Representation in Horror, which was nothing but amazing, talented Black women who had some really smart shit to say about horror (along with a badass powerpoint presentation with gifs that I need in my life). 

Short Film Blocks.

All in all, we sat through three short film blocks; one was AMAZING, one was so-so, one was fucking garbage. I don’t want to be a negative Nancy, but I was very disappointed that filmmakers in the Northwest apparently don’t know how to make a film that’s not rife with lazy, boring misogynistic horror tropes. One film (with an ableist af title that we saw literally right after the Mental Illness in Horror panel) was about a dude who blacked our and accidentally killed annoying people when they were being really annoying. The only problem with this? The only person he kills is his date…after she rejects him….on their seventh date….one can see how the “Danny only murders people when they’re being annoying ” plot falls apart when you realize he’s been on SEVEN dates with the same annoying girl and fails to kill her until she’s like “nah, I think I am done dating you.” No shade, but it was trash. 

Vendors

So much cool art, we could barley handle it! All together, we bought six pieces of art (for under $40). You can see some on my Instagram. Such a talented bunch! 

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Day 2, checking our of our hotel room ( the second one we stayed in after we discovered the balcony door in the first room didn’t close).

We ended up checking out Saturday and heading home that night. We’re old and three days of horror partying is just too much. Maybe next year? 

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